How I Got Here

I didn't set out to review vaporizers. I set out to stop setting fire to things.

For years I smoked spliffs — cannabis mixed with tobacco, the way most of the UK does it, which meant I'd quietly picked up a nicotine habit I never actually asked for. I moved over to a vaporizer in 2017, but I did it half-heartedly at first. What actually made it stick was late 2018, when my GP raised an eyebrow and said "your lungs are doing more than their share of the work" — the elliptical British way of saying mate. Sarah threatened to make me sleep in the spare room if I came home smelling of Amber Leaf one more time. I took the hint properly that time.

I combusted my early devices more times than I'd like to admit, because I'm impatient and didn't read the manuals, and eventually got the hang of it. Then, being the kind of person who runs a spreadsheet on everything, I started tracking what worked and what didn't. Then I bought another device to compare. Then another. Somewhere around device number five, Sarah pointed out I'd accidentally started a hobby. Somewhere around device number seventeen, it became a job.

What I Actually Do

I test dry herb vaporizers to a fixed method, the same way every time, so the scores mean something when you compare them. Every device gets a minimum of four weeks in daily rotation before I score it. I test with two reference strains — one dense and sticky, one dry and fluffy — across three temperature zones, and I score against seven weighted categories where vapour quality carries the most weight, because that's what a vaporizer is ultimately for.

I don't publish first impressions dressed up as reviews. I'd rather be right and late than fast and wrong. If a device changes after six months — battery fade, a clogged airpath, a mouthpiece that works loose — I go back and update the review. The full breakdown lives on the methodology page if you want to pick it apart. Please do; if you think the method's flawed, I genuinely want to hear it.

The Rules I Won't Break

These aren't marketing lines. They're the actual boundaries, and they're why you can trust a score on this site:

• I buy or borrow every device. I don't accept free units or manufacturer samples.
• No sponsored reviews. No paid placements. No brand can pay to move a score.
• No review goes live before the four-week minimum test period.
• I don't adjust a score after publication because a manufacturer got in touch.
• I don't recommend a device I wouldn't use myself.

They pay me to be honest, not to sell you shite.

— Dennis M.

Why I Care About This

This stopped being a hobby the day I got my medical cannabis prescription. I use cannabis for chronic pain, legally, through a UK clinic — and I know how many people are now doing the same, often reaching for a vaporizer for the very first time. When your health is the reason you're vaping, the details matter more: precise temperature control, session consistency, a clean airpath you can actually maintain. I'm not a doctor and HerbVape isn't a medical resource. But I try to flag when a device is genuinely well-suited to medical users, and when it isn't.

There's also a plainer reason. Switching from combustion to vaping was one of the better decisions I've made, and it was harder socially than it should have been — the pub, the stag dos, the "you've changed, man." I write partly so the next person has the guide I didn't. You're not required to set yourself on fire to keep other people warm.

The Cast (Because You'll Meet Them)

My reviews aren't written in a lab. They're written around my actual life, so the same faces turn up again and again. If you've read a few, you already know them:

Who	The Role They Play
Sarah	My partner. Non-user — tried it twice in her twenties, "didn't see the appeal." Professional eye-roller, my stealth-and-smell test, and the voice of reason keeping me honest.
Dave	The experienced pragmatist. Heavy user, budget-conscious, owns devices older than some of my reviews, and thinks I spend far too much on gear. He's usually right.
Tom	Careful with everything, cursed with terrible luck. Researches a device for a week and still ends up with the one that breaks.
Jake	The clumsy one. If a device survives a fortnight with Jake, it'll survive anything. Most don't.
Mum	The usability benchmark. If Mum can work it, anyone can.
Amit & Marcus	My HerbVape colleagues on the lifestyle side — Amit on global cannabis culture and the science, Marcus on UK culture, music and the art of a proper session.

The Bits That Aren't On My CV

I'm a Manchester United fan, which these days is its own form of chronic pain. I have ADHD, which is both why I can tell you the exact heat-up time of forty different devices and why I once ruminated for three days over a mate's eye-roll. I do the maths on everything — cost per session, savings versus smoking, the lot — because numbers are how my brain argues with itself. And yes, I own seventeen vaporizers, and no, I can't reliably tell you which of them are convection by touch. Sarah has pointed this out. Repeatedly.